Bitchin’ Broccoli Cheese Soup - Creamy, Cheesy, and Totally Irresistible
Ingredients
- 1 medium sweet onion (diced)
- 4 carrots (peeled and shredded)
- 1 ½ ribs of celery (diced fine (don’t ask why we measure ribs; just roll with it))
- 1 tablespoon minced garlic
- ½ cup flour (the glue that holds this masterpiece together)
- Nutmeg (to taste (start small; you’re seasoning, not sprinkling fairy dust))
- 32 oz low-sodium chicken broth
- 2 lbs frozen broccoli florets (lazy genius move here)
- 4 cups whole milk
- 2 lbs Velveeta Queso Blanco (cubed into roughly 20 blocks (precision optional))
- 4 oz sharp white cheddar (shredded)
- White pepper and salt (to taste)
- Garnish: Sriracha (because we’re fancy like that)
Instructions
- Butter Up the Veggies: Heat a generous knob of butter in a Dutch oven over medium-low heat. Add onion, carrot, and celery. Cook until they’re just starting to brown—think “golden glow,” not “burnt crisp.”
- Garlic & Spice Magic: Toss in the garlic and stir for 30 seconds. Follow it up with your first sprinkle of nutmeg (go easy; we’re not making eggnog) and cook until the kitchen smells amazing.
- Flour Power: Add the flour and stir like your life depends on it for 2 minutes. You’re creating the roux that will make your soup luxuriously thick.
- Broth Bomb: Slowly pour in the chicken broth while stirring to ensure the flour doesn’t clump. Bring the mix to a gentle boil—nothing wild, just enough to get things moving.
- Broccoli Time: Dump in the frozen broccoli. Cook at a low boil for about 10 minutes, stirring often. This is where the veggies soften and absorb all the love.
- Blend Like a Boss: Attack the pot with your trusty stick blender until smooth. No stick blender? No problem! Blend in batches using a regular blender, but don’t burn yourself—soup can be sneaky.
- Milk & Simmer: Stir in the milk and bring it to a gentle simmer. Then reduce the heat to low because we’re about to enter cheese territory.
- Cheese Therapy: Add the Velveeta cubes one at a time, stirring until each one melts before adding the next. Patience, grasshopper—it’s worth it. Follow up with the sharp cheddar for that extra zing.
- Season to Perfection: Sprinkle in white pepper and salt to taste. Taste-test like a chef (or a very lucky soup enthusiast).
- Serve & Garnish: Ladle into bowls, top with a swirl of sriracha for a spicy kick, and serve immediately. Bonus points if you pair it with crusty bread for dipping.
Notes
Resist the urge to let the soup boil after adding cheese—it’s a one-way ticket to grainy-ville. And yes, this soup really does taste better the next day.
Enjoy your Bitchin’ Broccoli Cheese Soup—because life’s too short for boring food!